As I was pondering this contrast this morning, I realized some significant differences I had never before realized. A godly woman not only loves the Lord with all her heart and soul but also seeks HIS face in daily search for HIS guidance and direction of not only her purpose but those connected to her as well. A godly woman doesn't live to please the people in her life but rather serves the LORD in everything she lays her hands and spirit too. A godly woman doesn't hesitate to help another woman in need or provide shelter, food, or just a wise word spoken into another aching heart. A godly woman desires to be a treasure of the Lord's riches for the mate HE has provided to her. A godly woman has compassion for others and a passion for the wisdom and knowledge of her Father in heaven.
A worldly woman cares what everyone thinks or perceives about her. A worldly woman wants to always appear to the outside to be well put together, totally in control, and never a hair out of place. A worldly woman is eager to climb the latter of opportunity no matter the cost. A worldly woman doesn't serve others but rather has grandiose expectations of others serving her. A worldly woman has no time for a friendly smile, a warm sincere embrace, a prayer with a hurting heart, a quiet moment with the Lord and HIS word. A worldly woman is cold and bitter and battles with anyone interrupting her current goal and ambition. A worldly woman is always wanting more and never quite satisfied with what she has. A worldly woman is desperately seeking ways to rely more on self and less on anyone or anything.
What occurred to me this morning was for some reason I had always growing up had the ignorant opinion that a "worldly" woman was some mysterious woman of the night! You know, the ones with painted up faces, bright red lips and polishes, spike high heels and short skirts! The kind with tops bursting open and store bought breasts leaping out in your face... ready or not! But this morning I realized just how ignorant this stereotyping really was. There are many many women living worldly and outside of God's will for their lives and they aren't painted up harlots standing on street corners either! They are business women and career focused people blending in ever so easily with every day society. These are the women with whom something early in their lives have been scared and helpless and are just rebelling with fear to become stubborn in their feminist rights to claim what was once only a man's world. I can speak this... only because I have been there.
Yes, I confess I too was once a worldly woman!!! (No shocker to those of you that have known me for a long time!) I have lived my life as a woman in a dog eat dog world without Christ and let me add... I got chewed up and spit out! It about took my life. When HE decided to deal with me... I had to hit the bottom with total destruction of all things familiar and previously helpful. He had to remove all those rebellious, unclean, stubborn, self confidences, self strengths!!! When I was the weakest I had ever been in my entire life... HE MOVED! And as most of you know... my life has never been the same.
The devil didn't release the hold he had on my life without a fight... let me tell you. The devil would rather have had me dead than to see me swap sides and glorify God! We battled one morning about 9 years ago and as I took the pills to end my life... I cried out for God to forgive me but the enemy's hold was far to strong and I just could not do it anymore. I lay in a coma for several days with family and friends called in to say farewells. Life support tubes in every opening of my body and hands and feet bound to a bed. Death tried to take me... but God said my work wasn't finished here and HE had a plan for me weather I understood it or not.
I spent the next several years confused and even angry with God for not letting me just die. I twisted off into heavy drugs and a life style of drinking and partying even deeper than ever before. I was just living in sins right and left and still unsure of what was really going on. I had no rhyme or reason... only self loathing and self deprecating. I hated no one more than I hated myself. I was severely depressed and would actually pray to die very soon.
One day in 2004 I woke up and sat straight up in the bed to acknowledge I needed to stop everything evil I was doing and get my life right! Just like that... I quickly dumped every thing illegal in my home in the toilet and FLUSHED! Within a week, my friend called and asked if I might like to move into the country and buy their old home as they had just purchased another house. I quickly said YES! Joy began to fill me as I was raised in Macedonia for some of my childhood and always loved it here. After living in this house for about a month... another friend brought over the Passion of the Christ movie and we watched it together. About 1/2 way in between I had to excuse myself to the restroom to compose myself.. I thought!
As I walked into my bathroom... I hit my knees and truly repented for the first time in my life! The Holy Spirit was convicting me and I was rebuking those evils in my past. I understood for the first time... I was worth something to the LORD!!! I wasn't a piece of meat for men to devour and abuse! I wasn't a piece of trash kicked around on a street! I wasn't a piece of anything... rather I was a WHOLE woman of the most high God ever IF I chose to learn HIS ways and allow HIS adoption of my heart and soul. My life has never been the same.
While I have surely stumbled multiple times since then... I have never quit and gave up. I have strong faith, great wisdom, and ever growing progressive sanctification! I am a work in progress and I love it.
I am a child of the living God and a daughter of my Father in heaven. Christ took that bruital beating so I could find healing. Christ defeated death so I could as well.
I pray as anyone of you women out there today read this... you will praise our God for what HE has done in your lives. I know we all have testimonies and this is a portion of mine... but HE deserves every bit of the glory and I pray for every woman struggling with the world this day... they find the LORD of hosts instead standing with arms open wide saying to their soul, "Come to me my child!" I pray everyone will know who they are and what is before us to become!
Sincerely written in love and testimony of our Lord Christ Jesus,
Deborah
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